![]() ![]() ![]() How to make a plan? Here are some suggestions to help you.Ĭall ahead: Call and talk with a caregiver or nurse and see what they can advise about the best time of day to visit your loved one or friend. It takes just a bit of planning and courage to create meaningful visits with someone who is ill, injured or dying. Whether someone is ill, or dying, suffering from chronic physical or mental illness, or has dementia or Alzheimer’s, what matters as human beings is that we show up for those we love in their present day and put thought into bringing joy to the moments they experience in this life. I wrote this post by keeping in mind one simple concept. When we were done with our talk I realized, yes, it’s time for another checklist on this blog. While Vanessa was cutting my hair, we started brainstorming about this situation and what Vanessa could do on her visits. Grannie no longer recognized Vanessa and became agitated easily, so Vanessa was searching for a way to make her visits short, fun and positive, even if her Grannie could not recognize her. Grannie, who was Vanessa’s 94 year old great-grandmother, was dying and suffered from dementia, so this was a bit of a challenge. I had a recent visit with my young friend Vanessa, (who is also a gifted hair stylist!) and she asked me to coach her on how to make visiting her “Grannie” a positive experience for both of them. The answer to all of these questions is simple: It’s YOU! Your compassion, love, care and thoughtfulness are the best presents you can offer someone who is sick, in a hospital, living in a nursing home, at home and bed bound with illness or injury, or someone who is dying in hospice. Readers also ask what they can or should bring, do, or say when visiting an elder, or someone on their sickbed, or a terminally ill family member, or a friend who may be bed bound at home, or a loved one living in a nursing home? This can help them to understand your grief, and in turn, act in a way that is more sensitive to what you're going through.Readers of this blog often ask me “What is the best present I can bring someone who is dying?” This can be really difficult but it’s important to try and be honest about how you're feeling with the people around you. You might experience feelings associated with disenfranchised grief during this time, particularly if you find that their birth relatives aren't open to involving you in their grieving process. Your chosen family or someone you considered part of your familyįriends can often feel like family, and that’s why lots of people can struggle after the death of someone they considered to be like a brother or sister. This is because they might have other family members who are grieving too, and sometimes navigating those new relationships can be difficult - especially at a time when emotions are high. If you grew up with your step-sibling or foster sibling, their death can leave you feeling like a part of you is missing, even if they weren’t part of your life from birth.īut their deaths can sometimes lead to more complicated situations too, particularly if you only knew them for limited time. These thoughts and feelings can be really difficult to cope with, so try to remember to be kind to yourself as you grieve.ĭifferent families will have their own unique situations, and some people may have step or foster siblings who have been part of their lives. You may find yourself wishing that you had been on better terms when they were alive, or that you had been more involved in each other’s lives. If you had a difficult relationship with them, or if you were estranged from each other for a long time, it can be common to feel regret. Your relationship with your sibling will play a key part in how you react to their death and how you feel through your grief journey. ![]()
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